Coffee with Jess: Vlog #2

Hey, everyone! It’s Friday and today is another vlog! It’s a little longer than 2-3 minutes, but I’m telling a story thanks to Lacie Nezbeth and her question so…


Also a thanks to Martha Ramirez for the Liebster Award! Yay!

See you on Monday! *I may have exaggerated a southern accent for the sole purpose of humor…just sayin!

23 thoughts on “Coffee with Jess: Vlog #2

  1. Your shining smile was the first thing I saw this Friday! (Except for my sweet Golden, Jenny, of course.) It's going to be a good day.

    Loved the vlog. You are so dang funny.

    If the lovely, kind lady didn't allow me to go ahead of her, I would probably start telling her about the article I just read and point out all the preservatives and ingredients in the food she's buying that are killing us all… slowly. with. each. and. every. bite.

    If she did let me pass on through, that would definitely be more lovely. I like that side of me much better.

     
     
  2. Oh my gosh, I giggled…so…much.

    My favorite part was the lie…"I just lied…it's not early…I don't even know what I'm saying!" And the disclaimer at the end, priceless!

    Honest truth, what I would do: Wait…and in an effort not to silently seethe, 'cause that's just energy-sapping, probably daydream about my next chapter…or the cute guy the next aisle over.

    What I'd do if I had no restraint and a heck of a lot more lung power – chuck a $20 at the cash register and run.

    Happy Friday. Love the vlogging fun! Oh, and if I think of a hilarious question, I'll shoot it your way. 🙂

     
     
  3. You're so cute!!

    I would try humor and offer to buy her a candy bar. And if she let me, I would buy it for her! LOL

    PS. On a side note…
    I was sick in in bed in November and watched North and South for the first time since Netflix recommended it to me. Well…I am a total Richard Armitage fan now!!!

    So, if you haven't already, go to your Netflix and look up BBC Robin Hood TV series where Guy of Gisbourne is played by RA and watch the first 2 seasons. You will thank me. Seriously. 🙂
    It's the first time ever where I'm almost rooting for the bad guy. LOL

     
     
  4. My brain's not on.

    I have a question and a comment.

    What if you thought her hair was ugly?

    I'd likely do the not-so-funny head bobbing to see if any other lanes opened up quicker and I'd run to those.
    ~ Wendy

     
     
  5. Stacey South

    I often go into Walmart to buy one, or a couple of items, and I usually end up stuck behind somebody that has a ton of stuff. What I do is stand there and basically burn a hole in the back of their head with my eyes.. Then when they turn around, I make it obvious that I have a lot less than they do. Sometimes I smile, sometimes I give them a "it's lame that you have more than me" look. Most of the time it works, and when they tell me to go ahead, I'll say "are you sure?" a few times, just so I don't sound too eager. If not, I sigh and continue staring them down while they wait and proceed to check out, while I still have way less than they do.

     
     
  6. Heather: That's hysterical. I can just see her face falling with every sentence you speak. LOL Yay for good days!

    Tagg: Truth is, that's exactly what I would really do. I always take my Skull Candy with me and listen to music, daydream while I shop, so I'd just drift away while she does her thing!

    Jennifer: I saw that! I'll have to add it to the instant Q! Definitely going to watch it.

    Wendy: My brain isn't on today yet either. I've been up since 3:30! Ack! IDK Y! Well, I kinda thought a set and perm wasn't exactly beautiful, although, when I'm a more senior age, I may have mine done too! 🙂 I do the head-bob thing all the time.

    Stacey: I can so see you doing that! Hilarious! So glad Blogger let you comment. 🙂

     
     
  7. Jessica, I just love you!

    This actually happened to me in reverse the other day. I was at Sam's Club with practically two cart fulls (and squirming kids) when someone lined up behind me with one thing. I WAS in a hurry -I forget why- but I let them go ahead of me. Two minutes later, another person got in line behind me with four items. And I let them go. Repeat two more times!! Finally they opened up another check out line! As I drove home later, I realized only one of the four said thank you!

    Thanks for making me laugh…again! 🙂

     
     
  8. You are completely adorable! Hugs and have a great weekend!!! :O)

     
     
  9. Oh, Jess – you are SUCH a riot! LOVE the vlog – and you were CONVINCING, girl – ever thought about acting?? 😉

     
     
  10. Jess, You. Are. A. Scream!

    My daddy has deep southern roots (being from Georgia)and he still has a thick southern accent to go with them. Love it! (And it truly is a whole 'nother way of life in the south– "genteel," as you say.)

    What would I do? Hmmmm… I don't care for crowds either so I might be tempted to do what you said you would do. But just tempted, mind you. Because I'm a PK. And everyone knows that PKs are kind, gentle, sweet, and above anything unsavory. 🙂

    No, truly, I AM sort of a Pollyanna. Been accused of it all my life. It's in my blood.

    Here's what I want to know. What would you do if… You were stopped at a stop sign, rear-ended by a lovely 89-year-old matron, and she tottered out of her 15-year-old Buick and said, "Why did you stop? Now YOU'VE made me late for my beauty shop appointment."

    Yep. True story.

     
     
  11. You're so cute I just wanna bite you! What a delightfully fun vlog. And I can no more seeing you running over the old broad than wearing a tutu. Hahahaha! Hugs!

     
     
  12. You are too cute and funny, Jessica. Love it. 🙂

     
     
  13. "Kick that broad down." Priceless!

    We routinely are stuck with only one real check-out lady and a slew of self-checkout lanes. If I have more than 10 items, I hate self-checkout. So I will wait in that line. Here in the lower mid-west, we're (or maybe I am?) passive aggressive, so we do the glare-o-death or the heavy-sigh-and-toe-tap. It works!

     
     
  14. You're not above a 'kick me' note? LOLOL!!!!

    What would you do if you were at the movies and someone was being loud…like rattling the Milk Duds in the box and talking on their cell phone loud?

     
     
  15. Very fun-neee!

    I think I'm picking up your sweet southern accent.

     
     
  16. First off, I hate crowds too. Our store, no matter when you go, has them, so I've been in this situation often. Typically, I silently encourage my children to have a meltdown and then talk REALLY loud about how they need to learn patience, it's not the lady's fault that she ACCIDENTALLY got into the lane with WAY TOO MANY groceries. Maybe she can't read…but we need to be nice and forgive her. Then I smile at her and thank her for helping teach my kids a powerful lesson.

    No. Really. I don't do that. Of course not.I pray for her.

    Have a great day, Jess – and thanks for the laugh!

     
     
  17. What would I do. Hand her my business card! LOL I do hair!

    Or hand her a co-worker's card.

    Love your smile, Jess. Love how much fun you have creating these V-blogs. Fun fun fun!

    And THANK YOU for the thank you mention!!

     
     
  18. While she is rummaging in her purse, I would swipe her smartphone off the counter. Since I am a tech-geek, I will quickly find her phone number, mailing address and email address before returning the phone unnoticed.

    Using that information, I will sign her up for every service I can think of. She will get innumerable amounts spam from travel services, dating sites, generic Viagra products and money marketing schemes.

    I will go to the magazine section and fill out her name and address on every subscription card and mail them off. She will receive dozens of magazines for months with demands for payment.

    I will then give her information to the Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses as a possible interested convert so they will start coming to visit her early on Saturday mornings.

    To really show her, I would place an ad in the local paper that she is having a yard sale at 6 a.m. the following week with instructions to knock on the door for service.

    Lastly, because I am a Christian who cares about people, I will put her on the prayer list at my church.

     
     
  19. Thanks, everyone! You guys are always so nice. I'm cracking up at these answers and giggling over new questions. Can't wait to answer them!

     
     
  20. Get all JESSIFIED I love it. Love you! So good, you're the queen of making a vlog post uniquely entertaining. 😀

     
     
  21. Fun seeing you live! I'm posting my first vlog on tuesday and I'm so glad I'm not the only one who giggles!

     
     
  22. Normally, I would wait patiently and eye the candy display. But if I felt really mischievious and dramatic, I might get on my phone and pretend to be talking to someone.

    I would talk about how my police officer husband had just been killed in the line of duty. Then I might cry a little, feeling the grief anew, and add that I'm just trying to get to the funeral. The funeral is about to start in 10 minutes, and I, the widow am stuck in a grocery store check out line. I wouldn't even be at the store, but my late mother-in-law is OCD and needs her post-it notes. Otherwise she'll start ripping pages out of the hymnals, licking them and trying to stick them in conspicuous places around the church. And I need a bottle of wine, otherwise, I won't make it through the service…

    LOL! I couldn't remember if there was a third item or not. Great vlog, Jessica. I enjoyed your entertaining response.

     
     
  23. Just getting to this now. But hilarious!

    "I'm not above a kick me note."

    Oh. My. Goodness.

    Let the laughter ensue.

    Because, yeah, if you were really buying wine at 7:30 in the morning, you WOULDN'T be above a kick me note, would you? 😛

    I'd probably just raise my eyebrows and sigh a lot.

     
     

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